Monday, January 6, 2014

Lessons from the Iron Bowl

I couldn’t watch.  The anxiety and the tension were too much.  What would Saban decide to do?  Could we win it with this decision or would we fight it out in overtime?  I headed to the guest room and literally plugged my ears with my fingers.  Then I saw my mom’s face and knew the worst had happened ….........

Bama lost.  I began packing my things to head to my in-laws.  I was frustrated.  I was mad.  And I was disappointed.  I went back into the living room to see my family all in disbelief except my sister-in-law.  She is an Auburn fan.  She was in shock too and lucky for us she didn’t gloat or throw the win in our face. 

Stacy and I spent our ride over to the in-laws discussing the game and the ride back to Birmingham the next day talking about it.  We decided we were not going listen to the radio commentary or watch ESPN; we were going to move on and remain the loyal, devoted Bama fans we have always been.  And then I logged back on to Facebook.  I read post after post – some positive, a lot negative – and the frustration began to build all over again.

I didn’t want to spend my last evening at home in a bad mood.  I laced up my tennis shoes, put a leash on Teddy and headed out for a jog to clear my head.  I was sure there was a lesson in this frustration I had over the game.  I just had to find it.  And with each pound of the pavement, the lessons of the Iron Bowl came rushing to me.

1.      Be a gracious loser.  This is hard for me.  I was competing at Memory and Candyland as a child.  I do a victory dance when I win at Uno.  Being competitive is in my nature.  But nobody likes a sore loser.  It shows lack of character and I have to hold myself to a higher standard.  So I sucked it up and sent the text to my Auburn friends congratulating them.  I also gave my sister-in-law a hug and told her congratulations.  I sent out the congratulatory Facebook post to all the Auburn fans.  Was it easy?  Absolutely not.  It hurt.  But it was the right thing to do.  And how many times has our mama told us the right thing isn’t always the easiest.

2.      Own your decisions.  In the post-game interview, Saban admitted the Iron Bowl loss was on him and his team.  He praised the team and his coaches. And he shared the areas they didn’t come through. He didn’t make excuses or look to shift blame.  He took responsibility.  He held himself accountable.  He said he was proud of his team but “ultimately the responsibility is mine.” That is the true sign of a great leader. 

3.      Strive for excellence not perfection.  The Bama fans, me included, have been expecting perfection.  We always want a shut out or are disappointed when we don’t score at least 40 points or get angry when a kid on the field makes a mistake.  The reality is no one is perfect.  And the drive for perfection only leads to disappointment.  Alabama has won three National Championships in the last four years.  And those wins didn’t come by being perfect.  There were off games, losses, missed opportunities and bad play calling along the way.  It has been the dedication to excellence that has kept the University of Alabama football program on top.

4.      Support your team always.  I was so angry to hear of Bama fans sending death threats to our kicker, Foster.  That kid needed the loyalty and support from Bama fans more the night of the Iron Bowl then he ever has before.  We can get disappointed and frustrated in a player.  I sure do.  Just ask my family what happens with a sloppy tackle when I’m around.  But the truth is I don’t sweat at practice every day.  I don’t have to get banged up and bruised on Saturday.  These kids aren’t paid to play.  They play for the love of the game, to build a future and for their fans.   And we need to love them when they win and love them even more when they lose.  They depend on us for support and encouragement just like we depend on them for an entertaining game. 

5.      Embrace the memories.  You often hear “oh it’s just a game.”  But not to me.  It’s so much more.  It’s about the memories we make each year during the Iron Bowl – laughing with our family, everyone getting dressed up in their Bama gear (dog included), enjoying boiled peanuts to snack on, and my aunt doing her dance and cheer when Bama scores.  Strive to create new traditions with your friends and family that ensures it isn’t just a game.  Let the Iron Bowl be more than a game but rather an opportunity to share in memories that will last a lifetime.

So I’m taking my lessons (and some humble pie) and moving on from this year’s Iron Bowl.  I proudly sported my Big Al pillow, houndstooth bag and Bama t-shirt through the airport on the Monday after the game.  And I look forward to watching my Crimson Tide play in a bowl game.

Roll Tide Always!